i was made in heaven...now i'm just a ma(i)d. damnit.
totally (made) in heaven
- (made) in heaven
- always living in the past, infamous for my laziness, my depression cycles, my frail body frame, and my ever so tiring entanglements with men. someone who has no direction whatsoever in life, always waiting for things to happen to avoid having to make wrong choices in life. noisy most of the time, silenced only when wrong or unsure. bored easily. trying to get myself to think out of the box, also looking for a chance to get out of this stupid box(?). neither do i see that supposedly thick and high wall!) really happy now, like NOW, and maybe for the next few hours. maybe forever, maybe not. will be fat at forty (maybe that's why i won't be happy anymore?) urgh. think i make a pretty good aunt agony person tho. i've probably heard enough preachings on how i have to get on with life, i bet i can compile everything, even filter out the useless bits, and produce the best feel-good speech anyone can ever imagine. if that doesn't work, my (past) sob stories can make anyone feel like they'll always have me to compare with and feel SUPERB about themselves. if THAT doesn't work, then i can conduct classes on how to pretend to be happy, or even how to whine and feel better about oneself.
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